Miley Cyrus is awesome. She is a fashion icon…and not just to robot lesbians who admire her dyke hair, but to tweens everywhere who are now going bra-less and wearing spandex shorts everywhere they go, making me happy to not be a schoolteacher, as with the early onslaught of puberty, coupled with parents who don’t seem to mind that their daughters are dressed like 80’s hookers, wanting to have sex with them and not being able to have sex with them is probably challenging, no matter how morally grounded you are.
You see, just the other day, I was in line for coffee behind a grandfather and his 15-year-old granddaughter who had legs for days and a booty that wouldn’t quit, with C-cup tits and a toned stomach busting out of a tank top. It made me feel really creepy staring…but I couldn’t stop staring, because as much as I don’t want to have sex with a tween, I had to take in the scientific miracles that genetically modified food has produced.
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